Torah Portion #11 Vayigash (Genesis) 44:18-47:27

Parasha: Vayigash Life's Hardships Thought for the Week: Joseph did not retaliate. Instead, he broke the cycle by offering complete forgiveness. He told his brothers not to be remorseful for selling him to Egypt. How was Joseph able to offer his brothers such a gracious and total pardon? He did so on the basis of his confidence in God’s goodness. He saw that, though the brothers had meant his sale into slavery for evil, God meant it for good. Everything had worked according to God’s plan and wisdom.

Why did God give us the Ten Commandments?

"He that keepeth the law, happy is he." Proverbs 29:18. "Keep my commandments: For length of days, and long life, and peace, shall they add to thee." Proverbs 3:1, 2. Answer: A. As a guide for happy, abundant living. God created us to enjoy happiness, peace, long life, contentment, accomplishment, and all the other great blessings for which our hearts long. God's law is the road map that points out the right paths to follow in order to find this true, supreme happiness.

Grace versus Law

James 2:1-26 The Sin of Partiality

Daily Bible Reading from BibleStudyTools.com November 13, 2012 - New American Standard James 2:1-26 The Sin of Partiality 1 My brethren, do not hold your faith in our glorious Lord Jesus Christ with an attitude of personal favoritism. 2 For if a man comes into your assembly with a gold ring and dressed in fine clothes, and there also comes in a poor man in dirty clothes, 3 and you pay special attention to the one who is wearing the fine clothes, and say, "You sit here in a good place," and you say to the poor man, "You stand over there, or sit down by my footstool," 4 have you not made distinctions among yourselves, and become judges with evil motives ? 5 Listen, my beloved brethren : did not God choose the poor of this world to be rich in faith and heirs of the kingdom which He promised to those who love Him? 6 But you have dishonored the poor man. Is it not the rich who oppress you and personally drag you into court ? 7 Do they not blaspheme the fair name by which you have been called ? 8 If, however, you are fulfilling the royal law according to the Scripture, "YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF," you are doing well. 9 But if you show partiality, you are committing sin and are convicted by the law as transgressors. 10 For whoever keeps the whole law and yet stumbles in one point, he has become guilty of all. 11 For He who said, "DO NOT COMMIT ADULTERY," also said, "DO NOT COMMIT MURDER." Now if you do not commit adultery, but do commit murder, you have become a transgressor of the law. 12 So speak and so act as those who are to be judged by the law of liberty. 13 For judgment will be merciless to one who has shown no mercy ; mercy triumphs over judgment. Faith and Works 14 What use is it, my brethren, if someone says he has faith but he has no works ? Can that faith save him? 15 If a brother or sister is without clothing and in need of daily food, 16 and one of you says to them, "Go in peace, be warmed and be filled," and yet you do not give them what is necessary for their body, what use is that? 17 Even so faith, if it has no works, is dead, being by itself. 18 But someone may well say, "You have faith and I have works ; show me your faith without the works, and I will show you my faith by my works." 19 You believe that God is one. You do well ; the demons also believe, and shudder. 20 But are you willing to recognize, you foolish fellow, that faith without works is useless ? 21 Was not Abraham our father justified by works when he offered up Isaac his son on the altar ? 22 You see that faith was working with his works, and as a result of the works, faith was perfected ; 23 and the Scripture was fulfilled which says, "AND ABRAHAM BELIEVED GOD, AND IT WAS RECKONED TO HIM AS RIGHTEOUSNESS," and he was called the friend of God. 24 You see that a man is justified by works and not by faith alone. 25 In the same way, was not Rahab the harlot also justified by works when she received the messengers and sent them out by another way ? 26 For just as the body without the spirit is dead, so also faith without works is dead.

Adding another calendar event to my schedule

As of late I have been feeling the guilt of not spending ALL of my free time doing something at church. I thought that isolating myself at church, with only church members and doing activities from the church calendar would help fill a void. Add to that, my single parent responsibilities and work duties. I rush to get to church on time and I'm sleepy while the sermon is going on. Which means, I'm not getting any message into my heart. Regrettably I'm happy that the Shabbat/Sabbath gets here so that I can sleep. I remember when I studied my bible with my children at home, had a bible study group at my home and shared with people online... I felt Yeshua guiding me. Somehow I lost my way into the legalistic way of praising our G-d. Which is not really praising or loving my G-d. I am stepping back to my more private bible study so that I will have real rejuvenation with our Lord Yeshua on the Shabbat. I miss him being in my life guiding and loving me.

Bible Studies

There is this really nice bible study group that my 2 children and I have attended several times. We really enjoy the people and how personal the study group is. We have not been to study in awhile because of our schedules and other uncontrollable circumstances. We miss our study group at Connector Church, they put the lessons online for us who can not make it. Check their site out it's very informative.

Rosh HaShanah

Rosh HaShanah means Head of the Year and has this name because it is considered the “spiritual” new year even though it falls during the seventh month of the year on the Hebrew calendar. In Scripture, it is called Yom Teruah (The Day of Sounding/Festival of Trumpets) and is described in Leviticus 23:23-25. Rosh HaShanah is a day to focus on repentance and making changes that will lead to a new year that will please G-d. In fact, Rosh Hashanah is the first of the Yomim Nora’im (Ten Days Of Awe) the last of which is Yom Kippur, the Day of Atonement. We eat tzimmes (carrots with honey), honey cake and apples and honey, symbolizing our hope for a sweet new year. The shofar is a key part of the services, sounding as a “wake-up call” to us, as well as to hail G-d, the King of Kings and the One who will be our Judge. With great anticipation, we look forward to the day when the shofar will sound signaling Messiah’s return and the regathering of those who are united with Him.

Religion

Something me and one of my bible study groups put together. What is religion, anyway? Religion is where a person tries to be made right with God by keeping the law. While it sounds good and reasonable, in reality it is discrediting the work of the cross and the Blood that was shed for us. With religion, a 60 year old man would have to go back and make every wrong right and he still couldn't stand before the Lord with an un-defiled heart. Even after all that, the stain of sin wouldn't really be removed. The man who hanged on the cross wouldn't have a chance if Jesus was religious! Religion is man's attempt to be made right with God, just as Ishmael was an attempt to fulfill God's promise by human efforts: Galatians 4:21-31, "Tell me, ye that desire to be under the law, do ye not hear the law? For it is written, that Abraham had two sons, the one by a bondmaid, the other by a freewoman. But he who was of the bondwoman was born after the flesh; but he of the freewoman was by promise. Which things are an allegory: for these are the two covenants; the one from the mount Sinai, which engendereth to bondage, which is Hagar. For this Hagar is mount Sinai in Arabia, and answereth to Jerusalem which now is, and is in bondage with her children. But Jerusalem which is above is free, which is the mother of us all. For it is written, Rejoice, thou barren that bearest not; break forth and cry, thou that travailest not; for the desolate hath many more children than she which hath a husband. Now we, brethren, as Isaac was, are the children of promise. But as then he that was born after the flesh persecuted him that was born after the Spirit, even so it is now. Nevertheless what saith the Scripture? Cast out the bondwoman and her son: for the son of the bondwoman shall not be heir with the son of the freewoman. So then, brethren, we are not children of the bondwoman, but of the free." So what is the problem with religion? It denies the work of Christ and the grace/mercy of God in our lives! The fact is that religion is absolutely devastating to our relationship with God. Religion is often nothing more than a form of pride and self-righteousness that the devil works diligently to promote in our lives. Symptoms of dead religion Before I list these symptoms, I first want to say that you don't necessarily have to manifest all of them to show a bondage to religion. Satan will use different strokes for different folks. He may cause one person to feel very religious, while he loads the next person down with guilt, shame and condemnation over their past. Religion cries for justice... relationship cries for mercy If you feel like others need to pay for their wrongs or face the penalties of their wrong doings, and think nothing about them receiving mercy from Jesus, then you are caught up in a religious mindset. Religion is more interested in seeing people punished and receive justice for their wrongs, than in seeing people repent and receive grace and mercy from God. Religion likes to see people 'taught lessons' when they are wrong. Love desires the best for others, and is truly concerned over the other person's well-being. Love is saddened when it sees a person make wrong choices, whereas religion awaits the day when that person will pay the consequences for their actions. Jesus clearly demonstrated His true love for us on the cross when He said, "Father forgive them!" Religion attempts to discount sin in our own lives Somebody who has a religious mindset will find it very difficult to admit when they are wrong. This is nothing more than self-righteous pride. Religion tries to discount the seriousness of sin, so that the person feels better... all while avoiding the Blood of Jesus, which removes even the worse and bloodiest of sins! The reason we must see the seriousness of sin, is so that we are motivated to turn from it and repent! Dead religion is not interested in true repentance, but rather justifies the wrong as being acceptable for one reason or another. This also discounts the reality of the steep price that Jesus paid for our sins! Religion does not accept instant forgiveness Have you ever done something wrong, then felt like you had to 'feel bad' for a period of time before you can accept forgiveness for your sin? This is another attempt of the religious mindset to discount our sins, and make time seem to 'lessen' the seriousness of our wrongs. Once you repent of a failure, you must instantly accept and believe the truth about the Blood of Christ washing that sin away. The very moment you repent of your sin, God forgives you. He does not withhold forgiveness for even a fraction of a second... your sin is forgiven immediately! To delay the acceptance of your forgiveness, is to fall trap of the religious mindset in it's attempt to degrade the seriousness of your sin. Somehow, a religious mindset tends to 'feel better' about a sin, after a period of time has passed. Time does not make our sins any less; it does not degrade the seriousness of our sin. Remember, if we discount sin with any excuse (time, good deeds, etc.), then we are discounting the price that Jesus paid for our sin as well. We need to see our sin for what it truly is, and then realize the awesomeness of God's provision to have that sin removed from our account! Time is no different than good works in the religious mindset. Good works and passing time both have something in common, they seem to 'lessen' the seriousness of our sin and make it seem more 'forgivable'. It is absolutely vital that we learn to accept God's forgiveness, and forgive ourselves the very instant that we repent of our failures. To beat yourself up for a time period before accepting the forgiveness of God is to fall into the trap of a religious mindset. Religion and grace are enemies Religion wants nothing to do with grace; it wants to feel like it's right with God because it has somehow earned right standing with God by being good and 'keeping all the rules'. Grace humiliates religion, because grace admits to weakness and failure. Religion justifies it's actions while grace humbly realizes the failure and accepts mercy. It is a goal of religion to degrade the seriousness of sin, so that it doesn't feel so bad, thus avoiding the need to repent and receive God's mercy. In this passage, Jesus is rebuking the Pharisees for rejecting the mercy of God through John the Baptist's baptism: For John came unto you in the way of righteousness, and ye believed him not; but the publicans and the harlots believed him: and ye, when ye had seen it, repented not afterward, that ye might believe him. Matthew 21:32 The Pharisees rejected the grace of God, because the concept of grace humiliated their religious stature. Religion keeps record of wrongdoing Not only does religion try to get us to overlook God's love for us, it will also try to get us to hold things against others out of spite and unforgiveness, while God's Word tells us that love keeps no record of wrong: "And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity [love] shall cover the multitude of sins." 1 Peter 4:8 Now don't get me wrong, we are to judge the righteous judgment, which is common sense. If a person has not repented of their wrong, but continues in it, we may not be able to trust them with responsibilities that we could trust somebody else with. If you have been abused or raped, then you may not able to trust that person until they have earned their trust again (which may never happen). While it's important to forgive those who wrong us, it may be foolish to begin trusting them right away. For example, it normally isn't a good idea to leave your children alone with a child molester. Now if I know that person has truly repented, and sought deliverance, then it might be a different story. Trust can be earned, but we must be wise. What I am talking about here is when a person continues to brew things in their mind that others have done against them. They will continue to be bitter and hold resentment in their heart while they overlook the love that God has had for them, and fails to have that same love in their heart towards those who have wronged them. Religion expects and demands of others and self Religion is a performer; it expects others to hold up to a religious standard, and it also expects you to uphold to high standards as well (self-righteousness). Perfectionism and religion are good friends. Perfectionism says that everything has to be perfect, or else that person is bothered over even the pettiest of things that aren't up to their standard. Perfectionism criticizes the little things that aren't right, instead of being thankful for the things that are right. Now don't get me wrong, we are to do our best for the Lord and feel good about it, but not to the point that we are never satisfied with our work. For example, if you do your best at putting together a sermon, then turn around and criticize yourself afterwards for not doing good enough, that is perfectionism. Religion feels like it's earned something Religion expects to receive something because it feels like it has earned it (good deeds / works of the law), while a person who as a genuine relationship with God can have an expectation to receive from God because He has promised it and is faithful (God's promise). Religion in this case feels as if it deserves something, while relationship is merely believing that what God said is true. Jesus gave us a prime example of this in the Bible: And he spake this parable unto certain which trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and despised others: Two men went up into the temple to pray; the one a Pharisee, and the other a publican. The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, God, I thank thee, that I am not as other men are, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this publican. I fast twice in the week, I give tithes of all that I possess. And the publican, standing afar off, would not lift up so much as his eyes unto heaven, but smote upon his breast, saying, God be merciful to me a sinner. I tell you, this man went down to his house justified rather than the other: for every one that exalteth himself shall be abased; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted. Luke 18:9-14 Religion is envious of others Since religion feels as if it has to earn things by fulfilling the law or acts of righteousness, it becomes offended when it sees somebody else who has not 'earned' something from God, receive a gift or talent that was not given to them. Cane had a religious mindset, when he offered his crops as a sacrifice to God, after God had asked for something else. He was furious when God didn't accept his offering, but God accepted Abel's; this drove Cane to murder his own brother. In the NT, Jesus is found tying the murder of Abel to the religious people of that day: That upon you may come all the righteous blood shed upon the earth, from the blood of righteous Abel unto the blood of Zechariah son of Barachias, whom ye slew between the temple and the altar. Verily I say unto you, All these things shall come upon this generation. Matthew 23:35-36 When self-righteousness fails, condemnation sets in Why? Because when a person who has felt self-righteous fails in a way that they can no longer justify, then condemnation sets in, because they were not relying on the grace and mercy of God in the first place, but placing their faith in their own self-righteousness. Religion has a hard time trusting God Since religion wages war against relationship with God, religion has a hard time trusting God, but likes to always feel like things are under control. Just as religion does not embrace the concept of grace, it also is not comfortable with trusting God and yielding control over to Him in our lives. Religion likes to be in control. Religion is quick to discredit the ministries of others Religion is very judgmental and is quick to discredit others who are laboring in the kingdom for the sake of Christ. Even if a minister has a few flaws, but the rest of his ministry is bearing good fruit for the kingdom, religion will be quick to overlook all the good fruit, and focus in on the handful of negatives and flaws rather than the good fruit that is evident. Look at how even though Jesus was flawless in everything He did, the religious Jews would criticize him for healing somebody on the sabbath! Religion is very legalistic Dead religion is full of legalism. Legalism is strict adherence to the law, but also disguises itself in other ways. For example, a person may be dying of cancer, yet refuse to go to the hospital because they feel like if they go, then they are not trusting God for their healing. That's not true faith in God's Word, but rather a form of legalistic fear! Religion is argumentative and "always right" Religion likes to prove to everybody that it is right, and everybody else is wrong. Religion always feels that it's opinion is correct, and everybody else is still learning. This is a form of religious pride which the Pharisees practiced quite well. For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God; Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away. 2 Timothy 3:2-5 Correction does not settle well with religion Since religion is 'always right', it hates correction from others, even if it was done in a loving manner. Do you hate it when others show you where you've been wrong? This is pride and goes along with a religious mindset. Religion also shakes hands with rebellion Since religion is always right and does not like to be corrected, it naturally hates God-ordained authority which is in place to correct and to guide that person. Religion wants to feel like it is at the top of the food chain, and that it answers to nobody. For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God; Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away. 2 Timothy 3:2-5 Fearing the loss of your salvation? Anytime a person is tormented over the idea of losing their salvation, it is a direct result of a religious mindset or spirit. Why? Because if that person knew the loving and merciful nature of God, they would realize that repentance and acceptance of the work of Christ would restore them to right standing with Him (therefore no need to fear loss of something that you can obtain so easily - after all, it is the gift of God!). Unfortunately, they fear loss of salvation because their way of being right with God is somewhat 'earned', and they can never earn right standing with God. Are you scared or afraid of God? This is another fruit of the religious mindset. Anybody who truly understands the loving, merciful, and gracious God that we serve would realize that if they will repent of their sins and accept the free gift of God which was paid for on the cross, they will know that they are in right standing with God and that He deeply desires a loving relationship with them. Fears of the unpardonable sin This is a common one! As you can see above, if you are tormented over losing your salvation, then it means you are not looking at the loving and merciful nature of God towards us, but rather caught up in a religious mindset. The same concept is true with those who are afraid they've committed the unpardonable sin. They don't realize the loving and merciful nature of their heavenly father, and therefore they feel that He is angry with them and will no longer accept them because of what they've done. This again, is in a sense, earning your right standing with God. If you are truly repentant and have accepted the work of Christ on the cross, then there is no need to be worried about whether or not you are in right standing with God. I have done much research on the unpardonable sin, and to put it in a nutshell, anybody who has truly committed the unpardonable sin will not be interested in having a relationship with God whatsoever. You can read more on this subject in my teaching on The Unpardonable Sin. Religion is prideful and arrogant Religion is the worse form of pride. It lifts the person up on a self-righteous pedestal, while it sees everybody else as either unworthy. A prime example of this is found in a parable that Jesus told to the religious folks: And he spake this parable unto certain which trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and despised others: Two men went up into the temple to pray; the one a Pharisee, and the other a publican. The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, God, I thank thee, that I am not as other men are, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this publican. I fast twice in the week, I give tithes of all that I possess. And the publican, standing afar off, would not lift up so much as his eyes unto heaven, but smote upon his breast, saying, God be merciful to me a sinner. I tell you, this man went down to his house justified rather than the other: for every one that exalteth himself shall be abased; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted. Luke 18:9-14 You'll never feel good enough! You will never feel good enough for right standing with God, if you are caught up in a religious mindset. No matter how much good you do, or how much you repent of your sins, you will never really have the feeling of "knowing" that they are forgiven, because your religious mindset is actually denying the work of Christ and has made His work in your life to no effect to you. Christ is become of no effect unto you, whosoever of you are justified by the law; ye are fallen from grace. Galatians 5:4 Religious minds are un-thankful Why? Because they feel that they have earned what they have, and are too proud to realize that it was God who gave them everything they own... including their own life! Being thankful means being humble, and this completely crosses the grain of the religious mindset. For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God; Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away. 2 Timothy 3:2-5 Religious minds lack self-control In Second Timothy, it speaks of the attributes of somebody who is religious, and among those things listed is incontinent, which in the Greek means to lack self-control. A person who lacks self-control may be outspoken and blurt out what they feel, not considering what others may think or what God may think of their opinion. For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God; Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away. 2 Timothy 3:2-5 Religion has it's own agenda Religion drafts up a plan to build a ministry according to human wisdom, which does not require the intervention of God to build and promote his work. That is because religion does not trust God to provide the resources and needed finances that are necessary to carry out the work of Christ. Religion is all about traditions Religious people may find themselves caught up in man-made traditions. But the Bible tells us that our religious traditions can actually make the Word of God to no effect in our lives: Making the word of God of none effect through your tradition, which ye have delivered: and many such like things do ye. Mark 7:13 Religion displays false humility Religious people are often found proclaiming that we are mere sinners saved by grace. This sounds humble, but in reality it is disregarding the entire new birth experience that Jesus talked about in the Bible. Look carefully at these passages, and you'll find that we are no longer sinners, but dead to sin and raised to new life in Christ: Jesus answered and said unto him, Verily, verily, I say unto thee, Except a man be born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God. John 3:3 Likewise reckon ye also yourselves to be dead indeed unto sin, but alive unto God through Jesus Christ our Lord. Romans 6:11 Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. 2 Corinthians 5:17 To say that we are mere sinners saved by grace, when the Bible tells us otherwise, is in reality denying the work of Christ! I have an entire teaching which discusses the difference between a forgiven sinner vs saint. Here again, we find religious theology opposing the teachings and work of Christ! Religion is very judgmental Love sees the best in others while religion criticizes and judges them by their actions. If Jesus judged us by our actions, we would be hopeless! And he spake this parable unto certain which trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and despised [meaning to look down upon] others: Two men went up into the temple to pray; the one a Pharisee, and the other a publican. The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, God, I thank thee, that I am not as other men are, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this publican. I fast twice in the week, I give tithes of all that I possess. And the publican, standing afar off, would not lift up so much as his eyes unto heaven, but smote upon his breast, saying, God be merciful to me a sinner. I tell you, this man went down to his house justified rather than the other: for every one that exalteth himself shall be abased; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted. Luke 18:9-14 Notice how the above verse tells us that they were righteous, and despised others. In the NT Greek, this word despised accurately means to esteem others as less than yourself, or to look down upon them. Religious people base their identity and position with God upon their ability to keep the law (good works), so it is only natural that they look down upon those around them who fail to keep the law as well as they do. If you read the rest of the above passage, it is evident in their actions that they esteemed themselves above others. This is nothing more than religious pride and is detestable in the eyes of God. Religion is the opposite of love Religion says, "Prove yourself faithful, then I will accept and love you." God's love for us says, "I love you for who you are, and I want to remove the barrier of sin between us. I will send my own Son to die in place of your sins, and if you will just believe that this is true, I will indeed forgive your sins and clothe you with my righteousness!" But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8 It is clear from the verse above that God loves us for who we are, not because of anything we have done. It is indeed the gift of God, and not something that we could ever earn. That in the ages to come he might show the exceeding riches of his grace in his kindness toward us through Christ Jesus. For by grace are ye saved through faith; and that not of yourselves: it is the gift of God: Not of works, lest any man should boast. Ephesians 2:7-9 Jesus demonstrated the deep and awesome love of God when He laid down His life for us. Jesus even said that there is no greater way to demonstrate your love for somebody, than to lie down your life for them: Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends. John 15:13 All the while, religion sits there and says, "I have earned my relationship with God... I deserve God's goodness, because I have been good." Look at this parable Jesus told of the religious man versus the humble sinner who repents before the Lord: And he spake this parable unto certain which trusted in themselves that they were righteous, and despised others: Two men went up into the temple to pray; the one a Pharisee, and the other a publican. The Pharisee stood and prayed thus with himself, God, I thank thee, that I am not as other men are, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this publican. I fast twice in the week, I give tithes of all that I possess. And the publican, standing afar off, would not lift up so much as his eyes unto heaven, but smote upon his breast, saying, God be merciful to me a sinner. I tell you, this man went down to his house justified rather than the other: for every one that exalteth himself shall be abased; and he that humbleth himself shall be exalted. Luke 18:9-14 If you're going before the Lord, feeling that you've done something to earn His grace and mercy, then you can forget about it! As we can see from this passage, God is not interested in self-righteousness, but rather a humble and contrite heart. The Bible says that it is a broken and contrite heart that the Lord will not despise. The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit: a broken and a contrite heart, O God, thou wilt not despise. Psalms 51:17 A more accurate picture of God's love and mercy is found in the book of Hosea or for a more brief look at God's love, be sure to read Jeremiah 3:11-22. My favorite translation for this passage is the New Living Translation (NLT). You can read it in the NLT here: Blue Letter Bible [Jer 3:11-22] God's Word goes on to tell us that it is by God's great love for us, that we are drawn to repentance: Or despisest thou the riches of his goodness and forbearance and longsuffering; not knowing that the goodness of God leadeth thee to repentance? Romans 2:4 Also look at this scripture: ...Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with lovingkindness have I drawn thee. Jeremiah 31:3 Religion voids the work of Christ Religion is something that keeps SCORES of people from receiving what Christ has purchased for them! It denies the work of Christ and the love of God, rejecting the mercy that God wants so dearly for us to receive, and puts up an invisible mental wall between us and the love of God. The Bible tells us that if you are trying to be made right with God by good works, then you have fallen from the grace of God, and the work of Christ is of no effect to you: Christ is become of no effect unto you, whosoever of you are justified by the law; ye are fallen from grace. Galatians 5:4 It's no wonder Satan works so diligently to infect God's people with a religious mindset! Appearing godly but denying the power Today there are countless Christians who seem to appear righteous, but inside they are full of evil and darkness. Take a look at this passage in scripture: For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, blasphemers, disobedient to parents, unthankful, unholy, Without natural affection, trucebreakers, false accusers, incontinent, fierce, despisers of those that are good, Traitors, heady, highminded, lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God; Having a form of godliness, but denying the power thereof: from such turn away. 2 Timothy 3:2-5 This is speaking about people who appear to be godly, but are inside corrupt and full of dead religion. That is a pretty strong passage in scripture, but it gives us a glimpse into what dead religion looks like. While they may appear to be righteous, they are denying the power of God to save them and forgive their sins. If you've found yourself thinking, "My sins aren't that bad..." then you've experienced the workings of a religious mindset. Let us not forget, our sin carries the death penalty... it is worthy of death! That's how serious that God wants us to be concerning sin. For the wages of sin is death; but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord. Romans 6:23 Remember Adam? He didn't bring sin into the world by murdering anybody... he was simply disobedient to God and ate some fruit which God told him not to, and look at how serious of an affect his one sin had on the entire human race! Also consider this passage where Jesus gives a stern warning concerning how serious sin really is: And if thy hand offend thee [causes you to sin], cut it off: it is better for thee to enter into life maimed, than having two hands to go into hell, into the fire that never shall be quenched. Mark 9:43 The Holy Spirit has shown me that we cannot realize the truly awesome forgiving power of God until we realize the seriousness of sin! Until we realize how serious that our sin is, we cannot truly appreciate what Christ has done for us. Whenever we discount our sin, we are discounting the price that Jesus has paid for our sin. The idea of sin being serious business does not settle well with the religious mindset. Why? Because religion has no real way to overcome sin or make up for our failures. The religious person feels forgiven, not because of the mercy of God, but because their sins weren't all that bad, and so it was no big deal for God to forgive them. Excuse me, but sin carries the death penalty and Jesus gave his life so that we might be forgiven! The dangerous thing is that most people with a religious mindset don't even realize what is going on. We need to realize two things: (a) the awfulness of our sin and (b) the awesomeness of Jesus' work on the cross as payment to forgive even the bloodiest of sins! God's Word tells us that though our sins be as red as crimson (which I believe represents murderous bloodshed), He desires to make us as white as snow: Come now, and let us reason together, saith the LORD: though your sins be as scarlet, they shall be as white as snow; though they be red like crimson, they shall be as wool. Isaiah 1:18 It may feel good to discount our failures, but it also discounts the Blood of Jesus and the steep price that Jesus paid for us on the cross. It doesn't just feel good, but it's life-changing when we come to realize what Jesus truly went through for our sins, and how the price has been paid IN FULL for our forgiveness. Being justified freely by his grace through the redemption that is in Christ Jesus. Romans 3:24 Being justified, according to NT Greek, means to be rendered innocent or just as if you've never sinned. God's Word also goes on to tell us that through the work of Christ, we can be clothed with the righteousness of God! Even the righteousness of God which is by faith of Jesus Christ unto all and upon all them that believe... Romans 3:22 Religion makes people ignorant of God's righteousness, and attempts to establish righteousness apart from the work that Christ did for us on the cross. We need to believe upon the work of Christ on the cross and receive HIS righteousness! For they being ignorant of God's righteousness, and going about to establish their own righteousness, have not submitted themselves unto the righteousness of God. Romans 10:3 Religion is prideful and degrades the seriousness of sin, while true humility admits when it's wrong and accepts the work of Christ on the cross and thereby receives grace and forgiveness for their sins. Jesus & religion are enemies Jesus was furious with those who promoted dead religion! Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye pay tithe of mint and anise and cummin, and have omitted the weightier matters of the law, judgment, mercy, and faith: these ought ye to have done, and not to leave the other undone. Ye blind guides, which strain at a gnat, and swallow a camel. Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye make clean the outside of the cup and of the platter, but within they are full of extortion and excess. Thou blind Pharisee, cleanse first that which is within the cup and platter, that the outside of them may be clean also. Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! for ye are like unto whited sepulchers, which indeed appear beautiful outward, but are within full of dead men's bones, and of all uncleanness. Even so ye also outwardly appear righteous unto men, but within ye are full of hypocrisy and iniquity. Woe unto you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! because ye build the tombs of the prophets, and garnish the sepulchers of the righteous, And say, If we had been in the days of our fathers, we would not have been partakers with them in the blood of the prophets. Wherefore ye be witnesses unto yourselves, that ye are the children of them which killed the prophets. Fill ye up then the measure of your fathers. Ye serpents, ye generation of vipers, how can ye escape the damnation of hell? Wherefore, behold, I send unto you prophets, and wise men, and scribes: and some of them ye shall kill and crucify; and some of them shall ye scourge in your synagogues, and persecute them from city to city: That upon you may come all the righteous blood shed upon the earth, from the blood of righteous Abel unto the blood of Zechariah son of Barachias, whom ye slew between the temple and the altar. Verily I say unto you, All these things shall come upon this generation. Matthew 23:23-36 Why was Jesus so furious with those who promoted dead religion? Because dead religion leads His children astray, getting them to deny the very work that Christ has done for them on the cross. Let's not forget, God's children are VERY dear to Him, and when you cause one of His children to stumble, He takes it personally: Then said he unto the disciples, It is impossible but that offenses will come: but woe unto him, through whom they come! It were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and he cast into the sea, than that he should offend one of these little ones. Take heed to yourselves: If thy brother trespass against thee, rebuke him; and if he repent, forgive him. And if he trespass against thee seven times in a day, and seven times in a day turn again to thee, saying, I repent; thou shalt forgive him. Luke 17:1-4 Religion is a roadblock Religious strongholds will keep us from knowing God intimately and receiving what was freely given to us (peace with God, healing, deliverance, etc.). This mindset will deny the very means of our reconciliation with the Father, and that is the work of Christ on the cross. The Jesus presented in religious theology is NOT the Jesus of the Bible. The Jesus of the Bible does not condemn you like the religious Jesus does: When Jesus had lifted up himself, and saw none but the woman, he said unto her, Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee? She said, No man, Lord. And Jesus said unto her, Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more. John 8:10-11 Religion also keeps many non-believers from accepting Jesus; they feel that they've made too many mistakes to be accepted and cleansed of their past. They think that religion means that they must earn their good standing with God, and because of their past, it looks hopeless. The truth is that Jesus loves us for who we are, not what we've done, and before we even came to Christ, He laid down His life for us: But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. Romans 5:8

What Does it Mean to be a Spiritual Person?

..."There are many religious people who are anything but kind. We all know of religious people who are extremely judgmental, righteous, and outright mean. Can you be both religious and spiritual? Of course. But only when you are operating in your religion from your heart rather than from the learned dogma of your mind."... "G-d is the energy of Love that created us and sustains us. In my experience, "G-d is Spirit" (John 4:24) and "G-d is love" (1 John 4:16). Anything that is not of love, peace, joy, truth and kindness is not of G-d. Praying to G-d does not mean that you are allowing the spirit that is G-d - the love, peace, joy, truth and kindness that is G-d - to guide your thoughts and actions. If you want to be a spiritual person, then let kindness be your guiding light - kindness toward yourself, toward others, toward animals, and toward this beautiful planet that is our home. Recognize that we all have the spark of Love that is G-d within us, and learn to honor that love so that you can know and experience the Oneness of all that is.

What is the primary purpose of a romantic relationship?

...Actually, the purpose of a romantic union is to provide support and bring out the best in each other, so that each individual has the nourishment and strength to go out in the world and reach the life goals that each individual has. Meanwhile, in bad relationships, the relationships actually drain both partners and hold them back from what they could otherwise be doing to advance themselves and to keep evolving as individuals....

Love is...

...not a feeling, love is a decision you make and continue to make in order to create an experience that is described as love. Love is an action that if you don't use it you lose it. Love is like any communication, if you never send it out, you won’t get a return. Love is something you give to others not something you feel because something happens to you. I was under the delusion that love was a feeling, something that was going to happen to me. Love is not something that happens to you but something that you make happen to you and happen to others. Love is something that grows from your actions and decisions. Wikipedia also states love as an experience related to a strong sense of affection. Affection is a "disposition or state of mind or body"[1] that is often associated with a feeling or type of love. This definition suggests that you do something rather than have something done to you. How do you feel affection for anything? You would actually decide to show it love, admire it, pay attention to it, treat it right, honor it, praise it, and find the good in it. At which point you will then have affection for it. Mistreat it, lie to it, and ignore it and I assure you that you will not feel affection for it nor will you ever say you love it. Love is probably the single most universally desired human quality that exist on this planet. Love is not something you can buy or barter, it is not taught at school, it doesn’t matter how rich you are, your IQ, race, creed, religion, social economic status or who you know. So on this day practice making a decision to love and then following that decision up with actions that communicate love. Remember love is not a feeling; love is a decision!

Magdalena Today

Magdalena Today Walking With Jesus Step 1: Be Sure If you have accepted Christ as your Lord and Savior, you can be sure you are a Christian. You are not a Christian because you go to church, or because you do good things. The Bible says "If you confess with your mouth, 'Jesus is Lord,' and believe in your heart that God raised Him from the dead, you will be saved" (Romans 10:9). Christ came to die for our sins, so that "To all who received Him, to those who believed in His name, He gave the right to become children of God" (John 1:12). Step 2: The Holy Spirit God has given the gift of the Holy Spirit to those who accept Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord. When Jesus left this earth, He said that God His Father would send the Holy Spirit to be in His disciples. If you are a Christian, you can ask God to fill you with His Holy Spirit each and every day. (John 7:37-39) Step 3: Bible God has not left us without help in leading the Christian life. He inspired holy writers over the centuries to write the Bible-- 66 books organized into the New Testament and Old Testament. You can learn about Jesus; learn how to live a Christian life; and study the lives of godly men and women of old by reading the Bible. Start by reading a chapter every day of the book of John in the New Testament and ask God to open your eyes and heart to His truth. Step 4: Church You are not alone in living the Christian life. All the true Christians in the world are now your spiritual brothers and sisters. We encourage you to seek out other Christians near you who can help you grow in your Christian life. You can learn about God; spend time with other believers; worship God; and help and serve others in your local church. (Hebrews 12:1-4) Step 5: Prayer God has given us the privilege of talking with Him. Talking with God is called prayer. We can pray to God at any time; Christ said He would be with us always. God as our heavenly Father loves to spend time with us. We can pray to Him and tell Him we love Him; we can ask Him for His help; we can pray for others. You can pray to God throughout the day, but it is also good to set aside some time each day when you can spend concentrated time in prayer to God. (Philippians 4:6-7) Step 6: Share Your Faith When Jesus left His disciples, He told them that they would be His witnesses--that they were to tell others about Him. As Christians, we have the privilege of telling other people the good news that Christ died for them. There are many ways of doing this: you can talk to people, you can send them an e-mail, you can give them a Christian book. You can also ask God to have His love shine through you. It is important also to pray for people you know who need to come to know Christ. (Matthew 28:18-20) Copyright (c) 2006 Global Media Outreach. All rights reserved. Used by permission" Copyright © 2010. All Rights Reserved.

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coletânea de louvor 2012.02.13.exe - 4shared.com - online file sharing and storage - download - Coletânea Louvor

Morning Blessings

Morning Blessings Blessing #14: Israel’s Glory Every morning, a set of 15 blessings is recited to express our thanks to G-d for all the things that we, as healthy human beings, are capable of doing. Ba’ruch Ah’tah Ah’doh’nai Eh’lo’hay’nu Melech ha’o’lam oh’tayr Yisrael b’tif’arah. Blessed are You, Lord our G-d, King of the Universe, who crowns Israel with glory. This blessing addresses the unique situation of the Children of Israel. From a religious perspective, the Children of Israel are crowned by the Torah, by our choice to accept the yoke of Heaven and to try and live up to this higher ideal, which brings us glory. From a more down-to-earth perspective, one might note the great achievements of many Jews in the areas of science, literature, art and more, as symbolized by the out-of-proportion numbers of Jewish Nobel Prize winners. --Translation reproduced with permission from The Koren Sacks Siddur, © Koren Publishers Jerusalem Ltd.

Solomon a Biblical Jewish King

Devoting one self

Given how influential the thing to which we devote ourselves ends up being, it's surprising that many people don't even know what it is they've chosen. On the other hand, reasons are like the layers of an onion, one lying inside another, and if we never bother to peel back the outer ones, we'll never be able to catch a glimpse of the innermost one. But if we don't know what it is, that innermost one will pull us around as if it were a finger tugging on a ring in our nose—meaning that we'll do things without thinking in order to satisfy it and retrospectively rationalize our actions. And because we'll mostly do this without thinking, we'll be hard-pressed to stop. Which means that if we want to increase the degree of control we have over ourselves, we should choose our object of devotion wisely. Money remains perhaps the most common object of devotion. And though it's certainly important, if this is the predominant thing around which our lives orbit, a limit will be imposed on the height to which our happiness can rise. The second most common object of devotion is probably other people. And though devoting ourselves to compassionate action seems to place no limit on our ability to become happier, if our object of devotion is a specific person, we'll find it quite difficult to avoid not trying to give them whatever they want, which often isn't at all what they need. Further, as I wrote about in an earlier post, The Good Guy Contract, we'll also put ourselves at risk for needing too much from them: when their wants aren't met, our ability to remain happy will often suffer as well. On the other hand, though pursuing altruistic goals has been shown to increase happiness, we may not want to make other people in general the object of our devotion either. Though the caring for others may be instrumental in securing our own happiness, doing so at the expense of our own happiness is just as clearly problematic. A balance must be struck—a balance that's not so easy to find. Which is why Nichiren Buddhism argues that the object of our devotion should actually be ourselves. Not our selfish, small-minded selves, but rather our wiser, larger selves—the wisdom and compassion inherent in life itself, which Nichiren Buddhism terms the Buddha nature. By devoting ourselves to uncovering this nature and to manifesting it in daily life, Nichiren Buddhism argues, we'll be able to bring all other aspects of our lives into their proper perspective. And, in fact, whenever I've found myself stuck, either unable to achieve a goal or unable to endure a trauma, it's usually because I've made that goal or that trauma my object of devotion. (What else would thinking about something all the time to the exclusion of all other things make it?) But when I've realized this and consciously refocused my attention and interest on manifesting wisdom, barriers seem to fall and forward progress again occurs. Only by manifesting wisdom can we figure out how to balance our concern for ourselves with our concern for others, how much to value money compared to experience, and what we must do to live the happiest life possible. To make the object of our devotion our best selves, then, is to find an object truly worthy of worship.

We are the walking version of...

...the Bible. What has your Bible taught you? Do you just study? Do you believe? Do you live the way Yeshua wants us to?

I am not perfect but I am a work in progress. Obigado Yeshua!

Observe all G-d’s statutes and ordinances, and do them.

G-d instructs Moses to tell the Jewish people: “You shall be holy, for I the Lord your G-d, am holy” (Leviticus 19:2). How does one make oneself holy? The remaining 35 verses of Leviticus 19, however, offer specific mitzvot to help one achieve this goal. Here are those that are applicable even without the Holy Temple: 1. Fear your mother and father and keep Shabbat. 2. No idolatry. 3. Leave the corners of the harvested field and the gleanings of the field and the vineyard, as well as the fallen fruit of the vineyard, for the poor and the stranger. 4. Do not steal, deal falsely or lie to one another. 5. Do not swear falsely in G-d’s name. 6. Do not oppress or steal from your neighbor. 7. Pay your employees on time. 8. Judge your neighbor righteously. Do not disrespect the poor, nor favor the mighty. 9. Do not act as a talebearer, nor stand by idly as the blood of your neighbor is shed. 10. Do not hate your brother in your heart. Rebuke your brother and do not bear sin because of him. 11. Do not take vengeance or bear a grudge. Love your neighbor as yourself. 12. Do not let your cattle mix-breed, or sow your field with mixed seed, and do not wear garments of mixed fibers (wool and linen). 13. The fruit of trees planted in Israel is forbidden for the first three years. According to many it applies outside of Israel as well. 14. Do not eat blood, practice divination or soothsaying, round the corners of your heads, mar the corners of your beard or make cuts of mourning in your flesh or imprint marks on your body. 15. Do not make your daughter a harlot. 16. Keep Shabbat and revere God’s sanctuary. 17. Do not try to communicate with the dead. 18. Respect the elderly. 19. Treat the convert as one of your own. 20. Keep honest weights and measures. 21. Observe all G-d’s statutes and ordinances, and do them.

How important do you think compatibility is for a long term relationship?

Rather than partnering with someone you consider to be hot, consider partnering with your best pal with shared world views, interests, life goals, and so forth. I would bet that in the long term you'd be glad you did! So what do you think?

LTR

If you are like me, no one ever sat you down and instructed you on how to choose a life partner. Yet, this is one of the most critical decisions we will ever make in life – with potentially huge repercussions for a less-than-ideal choice. A long-term relationship can be one of the most joyous and fulfilling experiences life has to offer. Although you may not have learned it from your mother, here is what you need to know to choose the life partner who is right for you.

Consider qualities that are important to you
First, become familiar with the qualities that you desire in a partner. It doesn’t matter what they are – what matters is that you are consciously aware of what is important to you. Take some time to reflect, write a list if it helps you, and keep at it until you are clear about what you want. Two qualities you might seriously consider are honesty and openness/flexibility. You need to be able to trust your partner to be straight up with you – about money, preferences, things they are doing, people they are spending time with. In addition, you will want to choose someone who is open to examining themselves, willing to take responsibility for their own behavior, and able to move with the ebbs and flows of life.

Remember these qualities when you are dating
Now that you have developed a list, have the wisdom to use it. We all know how easily we are sidetracked by sexual attraction, the blush of a new romance, relationship melodrama. If what you want is a partner for life, forget romance and be logical and realistic. As you are getting to know your potential partner, take some time to sit by yourself and determine if he or she possesses the qualities you desire. If so, happily continue dating. If not, find the strength within yourself to stay aligned with what you really want, say a kind goodbye, and move on. Abandon hope that things will change in the future. Base your decision on what you are certain of, which is what you know to be true now.

Discuss the big issues
I find myself in disbelief when I hear of newly married couples discovering monumental differences on some of the most essential life choices. Spare yourself this challenge by initiating open discussions about children (if, when, how many), child-rearing, money, work, religion, where to live, and relationships with extended family. The purpose of these discussions is to uncover any fundamental differences between you so you can decide if you want to continue the relationship. Do the research thoroughly, but also realize that priorities and preferences have a way of changing over time. This is why openness and flexibility are important. Learn all you can about your potential mate, and have the courage to walk away if the fit is not right for you.
Find a good friend
Sharing your life with the right partner is a joy. The intensity of the initial attraction will subside, so make sure that the friendship is strong. Do you have common interests? Is your conversation enjoyable and stimulating? Would you choose to spend a free day with this person? If your answer is “yes” to these questions, you have in place an important element that can make your relationship stand the test of time.
Find a lover
You really want the sexual part of your relationship to work, as stumbling in this area can cause great conflict and dissatisfaction. Appetites will change – often once children arrive or hormones begin to dwindle. Start off with sexual compatibility, and you are building a strong foundation now and for the future.
Don’t think that love, or sexual attraction, is enough
How often have you heard, “But I love him?” A long-term relationship involves so much more than love. A successful relationship requires communication and problem-solving skills, the ability to manage your own emotions, patience, selflessness. You end up dealing with child-rearing, balance between work and home life, crises that inevitably arise. Love and sexual attraction are beautiful expressions, but they are not enough for choosing a life partner.
Determine if you can solve problems together
Notice how you disagree, and how you recover from disagreements. If you or your partner defend your own positions, you will have difficulty coming to a resolution. The need to be right limits good communication. Look for, and be, someone who speaks respectfully and is open to other points of view.

Decide if you can accept your potential partner’s idiosyncrasies
We all have them. Ways of being, things we do, that are our personalities and quirks. Take the blinders off, and see with your eyes wide open to determine if the person you are considering is someone you can actually live with on a daily basis. Reflect on their energy level, preference for time alone, desire for social interaction, ways of handling stress, and level of cleanliness. Don’t be caught by the trap of hoping they will change, and don’t fool yourself into believing that something that bothers you now won’t continue to fester over time. People do change, but there is no guarantee. Contemplate within yourself to see if you can accept your potential mate as is.

Know your dealbreakers
Only you can know your bottom line. You deserve to be with someone who is truly interested in making your relationship thrive. If you are mistreated or disrespected in any way, think twice before moving forward. Take very seriously problems such as addiction, large debt, uncontrollable emotions, or severe mental illness. You can have tremendous compassion for people with these issues, but the likelihood of being in a satisfying relationship with them is negligible.

Be an amazing partner
While you are looking, use your time wisely. Reflect within yourself to become aware of the difficulties you might contribute to a relationship. Are you too clingy or afraid of getting close? Are you overly passive or controlling? Do you need to get your own life on track in some important way? Are you attracting, and choosing, people who aren’t right for you? Do you have annoying habits? Are you a grownup, able to make your relationship with a partner a priority over your immediate family? Be happy in your own life, and you will effortlessly bring happiness to others.

In choosing your partner, I’m inviting you to use your head as well as your heart. When you do, you are opening yourself to the possibility for the deepest intimacy and celebration of life. Allow your heart to expand in every direction, and enjoy the journey!
What have you learned about choosing a life partner? I’d love to hear your reactions and experiences.

Gail Brenner, Ph.D. is a guest blogger for PickTheBrain. She offers practical and inspiring wisdom for realizing true happiness at her blog A Flourishing Life, focusing on real solutions for self-defeating habits.

How to choose the right man if torn between the two?

How to choose the right man if torn between the two?
By shezz3085

When you were torn between two lovers and you were confused which of the two you should choose, think of wisely. There are many people who are engaged in situation like this, some are happy because they have chosen the right partner for them however there are some regretted because they failed to choose the right partner they wanted to be with. I myself have been a victim of this confusing and crazy situation and I’ve choose the man for me but couldn’t say yet if I would be happy for him since we aren’t yet married. But there are some tips I discovered choosing the right man for you if you were torn between the two.

Go with them when they are asking you a date. Try to compare their characteristics if they can pass your taste.

Check your feelings towards them and ask yourself if you really like them to be your boyfriend or perhaps a husband in the future.

Don’t say a word that would let them expect from you. All you have to do is listen to whatever they say. Asking for their hobbies and their interests is a good idea as well in knowing them better.

Don’t trust immediately on what they say towards you, they might not tell you the truth and was just lying.

Perhaps a little investigation on them is a great idea if you really want to know them better and if you really want to know who were sincere of them in you.

And last but not the least; Asking God as well who to choose is one of the most powerful ideas you should not miss to follow.

I hope it could help you and could give you an idea choosing the right man or woman for you.

Dating: Preparation For Marriage? Or For More Dating?

"Once I'm ready to settle down, then I'll get married, but in the meantime, there are too many new and exciting things I want to do. After all, I still have a lot of living to do."

But in reality, when marriage is done well, living is enriched, not thwarted. Our lives unfold and take shape in a way that no other experience can affect.

When we do marriage well — when we find a good traveling companion on this journey called life, and we love and are loved in return — life is anything but a ball-and-chain experience. Rather, it is an incredibly liberating and life-giving one.

In each of us there is a desire to love and to be loved. This longing for intimacy is met nowhere else like it is in marriage. In fact, marriage is uniquely designed to meet these desires.

The fact that 96% of Americans say that they have a strong desire to marry belies the fact that most of us (at least, intuitively) understand this reality.

We desire to love and to be loved — not just for a short time, but for a lifetime.

But when you look at the way we are doing dating:

- Is it really preparing us for marriage?

- Or is it just preparing us for more dating?

Quite honestly, it shouldn't surprise any of us that many men and women who do marry (approximately 50%) end up once again in the dating world.

After all, isn't the way we are doing dating in reality a better preparation for dating than it is for marriage?"

-Published on February 28, 2012 by John R. Buri, Ph.D. in Love Bytes

Love consists of Passion AND Intimacy AND Commitment.

Love? Or Being In Love?
The Experience Of Being In Love Is Not Love At All
Published on February 9, 2010 by John R. Buri, Ph.D.

Lots of couples end up in the marriage therapist’s office every day. But hardly ever does someone end up there who actually understands what love is. In fact, I would go so far as to say that it is rare for anyone to ever end up in any therapist’s office who actually understands what love is.

There is within each of us an inherent desire to love and to be loved. But if we are ignorant as to what actually constitutes love, then how will we ever hope to know whether what is happening between us and another person is actually love?

If the truth be known, what many (if not most) of us are looking for is not love, but rather, an in-love experience.

But an in-love experience is not love at all.

In-love experiences are almost always effortless --- that’s why we call it “falling in love” --- how much effort does it take to fall? But the suggestion that love is effortless is ridiculous. It ranks as one of the more stupid assertions ever made about love --- it ranks right up there with the line from the 1970s movie “Love Story”: “Love means never having to say you’re sorry.”

Furthermore, an in-love experience may serve to assuage the painfulness of life, but love does not. In fact, what many of us have discovered (by loving) is that when we truly love, sometimes the painfulness of life’s experiences increases rather than decreases --- after all, we are now concerned about someone else besides just ourselves.

As it turns out, way too many people are seeking to avoid life’s responsibilities through love, only to discover that what they were really seeking wasn’t love at all. Rather, it was an in-love experience. You see, love does not enable us to avoid responsibilities. On the contrary, love (by its very nature) carries with it more responsibilities.

If you are looking for something that is effortless, that will soften the painfulness of life’s experiences, that will reduce the load of responsibilities you are required to carry, then I would NOT recommend that you seek love.

Love consists of Passion AND Intimacy AND Commitment.

I am hard-pressed to understand how two MEs becoming a WE (the heart of Commitment) is effortless.

As for Intimacy --- maybe it’s just me --- but I don’t see how in-depth communication (the heart of Intimacy) is painless.

That leaves Passion. Admittedly, Passion is the easiest of these 3 to come by, oftentimes even effortless --- especially when the relationship is new. Furthermore, passion will often serve as an analgesic, alleviating the pain of life --- but only for a time - as with any drug, the effects dissipate until another fix can be found. And often Passion will have no strings attached.

Needless to say, Passion --- without Intimacy and Commitment --- is what many people today mistake for love. And it’s easy to see why --- it comes closest to mimicking the in-love experience.

But Passion without Intimacy and Commitment is not love.

Have you ever felt as though you’ve been duped --- you know --- by love? It seems so easy, so painless, so carefree. But then we come face to face with the challenge that is inherent in love. Do we decide to move on --- to a place of actually loving and being loved? Or do we stall the process, attempting to stay with an in-love experience, only to feel the inevitable frustration of trying to remain in a place that by its very nature is transient?

We have been duped, but not by love. Rather, we have been duped by the misguided notions of love so often promoted in our culture.


**Passion without Intimacy and Commitment is not love.

Why so many Denominations?

The New Testament reveals principles that guide us in out journey to finding truth. it describes the essence of Christianity clearly. A question that best describes the New Testament = What does the New Testament emphasize?

1. Love one another
2. Forgive each other
3. Build up one another
4. Accept one another just as G-d accepted us in Yeshua.


Ephesians 1

1 From: Sha'ul, by God's will an emissary of the Messiah Yeshua To: God's people living in Ephesus, that is, those who are trusting in the Messiah Yeshua: 2 Grace to you and shalom from God our Father and the Lord Yeshua the Messiah. 3 Praised be ADONAI, Father of our Lord Yeshua the Messiah, who in the Messiah has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in heaven. 4 In the Messiah he chose us in love before the creation of the universe to be holy and without defect in his presence. 5 He determined in advance that through Yeshua the Messiah we would be his sons - in keeping with his pleasure and purpose - 6 so that we would bring him praise commensurate with the glory of the grace he gave us through the Beloved One. 7 In union with him, through the shedding of his blood, we are set free - our sins are forgiven; this accords with the wealth of the grace 8 he has lavished on us. In all his wisdom and insight 9 he has made known to us his secret plan, which by his own will he designed beforehand in connection with the Messiah 10 and will put into effect when the time is ripe - his plan to place everything in heaven and on earth under the Messiah's headship.

A Gift of Time

“Time is your most precious gift because you only have a set amount of it. You can make more money, but you can’t make more time. When you give someone your time, you are giving them a portion of your life that you’ll never get back. Your time is your life.”